When The Vows “I do” become “I don’t”

‘Wathint’abafazi wathint’imbokodo’! (You strike a woman, you strike a rock)!

As a nation, we have a responsibility to stand against domestic violence and ensure that people are aware of it. The greater purpose however is tapping into the avenues that are censored and uncommon. It is important that we embrace the spirit of forgiveness, love and moving on. Yes, women have been abused and have spoken out, however, where are the sisters who will encourage a generation that will stand and say, ‘even though we have been abused and used, we choose to forgive our perpetrators and genuinely move on’?

Forgiveness differentiates between a victim and an over-comer. Forgiveness is for those who claim to have loved, who love and who plan to love. Forgiveness sets apart those who believe in love and those who don’t, for love does not keep a record of wrongs nor does it ever fail. Jesus when asked by Peter how many times to forgive his fellow brother when he sins against him told Peter to forgive seventy multiply by seven times. That is four-hundred-and-ninety times of forgiving the same person. That, my friend, is courage right there!

Do you know that forgiveness relives you? It causes you to keep on keeping on. Forgiveness is for your own liberation, not another. Refusing to forgive deprives you the opportunity to live, to embrace life.

I am inspired by Nonkululeko Ndlovu, the producer of a movie that will soon take SA by storm, ‘I Don’t …!’. She, having been a ‘victim of domestic abuse found the courage to forgive, the strength to move on and the patience to find her own wings’.

Nonkululeko boldly states that this movie was inspired by her own personal experience; how she triumphed over what many have deemed ‘a point of no return’ and blossomed evermore.

‘I Don’t …!’ is not just a movie but a movement, a film that aims to impact the world and inspire a new song. It aims to ‘create open discussions about the social ill of domestic violence and find out what the word of God says about abuse’.

In the movie, ‘I Don’t …!’ (Directed by Dare Oluwasanmi), the main character, Mpumi Mkhize (Nonkululeko Ndlovu), is a woman deeply in love and blessed enough to marry her perfect man. Turns out however, that her ‘perfect man’ is not as perfect as she thought he was because he starts beating her. Mpumi, after listening to her true self and leaning on her friends as pillars, decides to save herself and her daughter from torment. Mpumi, in the second sequel, ‘I DO…AGAIN’, returns to her husband, Themba (Tazz Nginda), who convinced her that he is going for counselling and is a different man altogether.

In the third sequel, things get more juiced-up and this calls for an intervention. Decisions ought to be made and Mpumi is in the centre of it all. What is Mpumi’s overall decision? Catch ‘I Don’t …!’! Coming soon…

Writer: Tsakani Mageza

For more info visit www.idontmovement.com

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